Regrets - is it good or bad?

Do you always wonder whether every little thing people do or say to you involves some kind of hidden agenda? Veiled messages; buried meanings behind every little statements or buried implications behind every act done by others to or for you? STOP doing so!!! You can do this at work, but never on a personal level because you'll end up with a 150/100 blood pressure reading and believe me, I'm speaking from experience.

By the way, do you have a regret list? Out the top of my head, my regret list would have the following;

- I have always believed that I will be treated exactly like the way I treat others. Thus it totally affected me when others acted outside the boundary of my version of 'Guide To The Ethical Treatment Of People'. While in fact, its my lack of understanding that other people might have their own standards too that was really the root of the problem.

- I have believed that the reason I lost $100 some time back was because I've flaunted my money in front of my 'friend' repeatedly and that it was my fault that I made it easy for her to take it from my purse.

- I always find good things to say about other people; like 'yes he's a demanding boss but he've also taught me much in return', or 'yes, Mawi can't sing well but just hear how soothing his voice is (when he's singing lah... and this is totally my opinion yah!)... and that its totally my fault that the response that I got back would always involve queries on my mentality level.

- I always say another minute won't hurt, only to find out that one minute led to another and before I know it; there goes my chance to hook up with that handsome Italian guy that's been asking me to dance all night long at an international student thingy several years back (this tops my all time regret list, period!).

Now the question, are having regrets good or should we just forget it and move on? For me, having regrets will help remind us of what could have happened in the past; and will in turn help dictate our present and future decisions. What have I learned from my regret list above? Always try to accept that what's wrong to you might not be wrong to others; don't trust people too easily; learn not to be too sensitive because at the end of the day, only you know what you really are...

And lastly... when a handsome guy asks you to dance 5 times in 2 hours, it means he IS interested!!!! You dumb, stupid, naive girl...!!! Who knows.. you might already have several blue-eyed darlings running around the house by now if only... sheesshh!!!

Iklan sekejap...

Sebelum apa-apa, aku nak minta maaf banyak-banyak pada kawan-kawan yang mungkin tak selesa aku guna bahasa pengantara Inggeris dalam blog ni. Aku dengan malunya mengaku bahawa my written bahasa Melayu dah lama rosak dek kerana penggunaan bahasa Inggeris kat tempat kerja dan bahasa Melayu pasar dalam perbualan sehari-hari. Nak posting guna slang Melayu pasar aku pulak yang tak selesa. So kena lah guna bahasa Universal... hopefully kalau ada grammar atau vocabulary mistakes tu, rajin-rajin lah tegur yek...

What's wrong with me?

I've realised something today that really made me wonder. Why am I partial to anything Malaysian? Until recently, I've always considered KL as my second home eventhough I've never actually stayed there for more than 2 weeks at a time. I'm a sentimental fool, that's what I am. My affair with this country started way back, during my second year at university (10 years ago... wooaa!!! Am I THAT old??!!!)....

I was a volunteer for an ASEAN University Sport Games thingy, hosted by my U and I was the liason officer for the Malaysian students contingency. In the old days, I was quite awestruck by their personality. I mean, the way they talk and act seems so familiar, its like watching a Malaysian TV drama unfold live in front of me. Anyway, they've proven that they're just normal kids exactly like myself, out to have some fun and try to finish their courses as fast as possible which translates to 'start work immediately'. My friendship with them grew from there and although most of it only lasted a maximum of 2 years (distance and time does that to relationships yah?) , they've lodged a lasting impression in my heart; of how mature and friendly Malaysians can be.

When I moved to a new uni in UK during my third year, I discovered a new revolution; mirc and internet chatting!!! I must say through it all I've managed to gain more friends and its of no surprise that most of them are Malaysian friends!!! And unlike the previous 'affair', this time round I managed to hold onto some of them till now; 9 years later (by the way, this still remain a record for me as I tend to move on as my life progresses)!!! Zila and Anis (if you're reading this), I really value your friendships and perseverence in tolerating my bouts of silence over the past 9 years. Both of you are like sisters I've never had and I will always love you to bits!!

The introduction of Akademi Fantasia 3 years ago led me to http://sultanmuzaffar.blogspot.com . This site opened up a whole new dimension to me; its informative and it brought along a sense of community within the fellow readers, commentors and bloggers. With my reasonable command of the Malaysian dialect, I managed to feel like I belong though its not as easy as my previous 'affair' in that work and family commitments restricted me from really getting 'into' it. Despite that and of course, the continuous inability to join in the gatherings of the 'community' that has cropped up from this site, I've always felt the sense of belonging... that I am one of them.

So what happened? I guess the inevitable happened. When groups of inviduals and personalities clashed, with all parties involved felt they've been wronged... the strongest of friendship will sooner or later falter, let alone minor acquaintances. Only time will tell whether the strength of friendship will persevere in the end.

Thus all that I can say is, 'Precaution is better than rectification'. And I believe if only we manage to uphold these three factors, 'Respect other people's opinion; Compromise; Put yourselves in other people's shoes', then any sort of rifts will definitely be eluded.

Thank you to those that has helped and guided me back to reality in the midst of all this huhaa. You know who each one of you are... thank you so much for making me feel right at home again.

An Intro to my thoughts

For those willing to respect other people's opinion...
For those willing to offer a compromise...
And for those able to put themselves in other people's shoes...